OUTDOOR PARENTING 101 - WITH JOHN E. PHILLIPS, JR.
Find a Good Wife Like you Pick a Good Bird Dog: She’s
Got to be Trainable and from Good Stock
 EDITOR'S
NOTE: All of us want the best for our children and want
to spend as much time as possible with them. My now-grown
son, John, has written his thoughts about the importance
of outdoor parenting, and I wanted to share them with
you. After hearing John’s recollections about
our time spent outdoors, I realize that sometimes we
don’t recognize the value of an outdoor heritage
or understand what time outdoors means to the young
people involved or how it impacts our children.
Marriage was always an issue I enjoyed hearing Dad's
perspective on, even at a young age. The summer before
I left for college, Dad  decided
to give me some practical advice for finding my marriage
partner and emphasized how important being selective
was. "Son, when you're searching for that special
someone, look beyond beauty, and see what's in her heart.
Don't fall in love with someone just because they look
good, can cook and have the best sugar. Finding the
right wife is like picking the best bird dog. First,
you have to know they come from good stock. You can
tell a lot about a person by her relationship with her
parents and family. Secondly, she must be devoted to
you and to your future children, because that's where
the real bond begins. Both of you must be trainable.
You have to find someone who's willing to follow you
wherever you go and to support you no matter what. You
have to do the same for them. Never settle  for
second best." I constantly returned to those words
as I spent my days sifting through the college dating
landscape and soon realized that finding that best person
for me was more difficult than I'd thought. Then one
day when I met that special person, Dad was right. I
didn't settle for second best.
Find Your Direction, and Change Your Vantage Point:
My father gave me a compass to wear around my neck
when I was 8-years old to use whenever I got lost in
the woods. At 20-years old, I was trying to discern
my life's direction when Dad and I went to one of our
favorite lodges, White Oak Plantation, to hunt white-tailed
deer. I’d reached a crossroads in my life and
had to decide in which direction my career might go.
This decision weighed heavily on my mind as we slipped
out into the morning darkness toward our tree stands.
Although the stands at White Oak were marked with flagging
tape, I  still
wandered off the trail and became lost in an area of
very-thick cane. Once the sun came up, I saw my stand
through the thick brush and climbed into it. I soon
spotted a glint of sunlight bouncing off a set of antlers
in the brush. Because the thick brush kept me from getting
a good shot, I stood up in the stand for a better vantage
point. When the buck came near, I made an easy, clean
shot. Later that night as I recounted the story to Dad,
he helped me realize how the day’s event could
help me through my feelings of uncertainty. “You
will stray off the path best for you at times and feel
lost. But, John, you’ll always have help finding
your way. If things are closing in around you, and you
can’t see what you need to do, then change your
vantage point.”
TOMORROW: REALIZE ABSENCE MAKES
THE HEART GROW FONDER
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